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Dabbing ls Cool

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jakepauler

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Dec 13, 2017
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— Introduction —

Dabbing is cool. You're jealous if you disagree of course and you'll end up getting dabbed away. Some people make rumors that dabbing is only for middle schoolers when in reality, I am right now in high school with many people randomly dabbing sometimes. This story is made to teach everyone that dabbing is cool! The haters can dab as much as they want, but there are plenty of backup plans if you think right.
If there's a hater, you dab. If they dab back.. then you hate. If they still dab then you can be a savage and get a group of dabbers and then they will know to not mess with you.

Chapter I - Dealing with the haters

If a hater approaches you after you dab, what should you do? Don't worry, this is commonly asked question in the dabbing community. The most common response to this is to dab back, but what if they dab back again? You will need to consider one of the following options. The first option, which is the most risky option and isn't really recommended is starting a dabbing war. My friend has risked this option and it did not end well. An alternative would be to hate, which is the best option in my opinion. They dab back, then hate as a good combat. They will either get triggered or leave you alone because you roasted them too hard. If this does not work you can try the third option. This third option is effective, but it may get you arrested, so get a good lawyer. You can whip. What do you mean by whip you may ask? You can whip them with whip cream or whip up a illusion that will lure them into daydreaming, or the violent way. None of these are working for you? There is still one more option! Fidget spinners, yes! Dabbing and fidget spinners will make them want to leave life. The emotion is so painful they may not survive with a doctor.

Chapter II - Dabbing at school

On the beginning of a normal school day, I dab going through the entrance of the school, entering my class when the bell rings and in many more good locations. The main thing that will be talked about today is when will it be the best time to dab and the strategies used to dab in the best places possible. One strategy you can use is the Surprise method. How you do this is by quickly dabbing when entering a place, going during a suspenseful moment, or at a awkward timing. A second strategy you can use is the leaning down strategy. When you go pick up your backpack you lean down. Instead of picking up your backpack normal, just dab right before picking up your backpack. A final strategy you can use is just surprising people. If you do a stupid move by mistake in the basketball game you're playing, dab. If you drop your phone dab. If you don't have an excuse for homework, dab. Be unpredictable, and you might be on the legendary dabber list.

Chapter III - Following the trend

Dabbing is clearly one of the most savage trends ever invented. With this being a trend, it also will make you cool. People will really think your cool if you dab at the right timing. With dabbing becoming popular brings its troubles. The haters dab back.. and it is much more common for people to dab back because of the popularity. This is still a trend and if you think it's not a trend, I'll dab back at you and it becomes a trend again. Haters will need to deal with it, /e dab.

Chapter IV - The strongest army

With dabbing, you're basically the strongest army out there. The dabbing army/group is even stronger than words can describe. If a hater tries to go at you, you can dab but they'll definitely dab back.. it's getting so popular to dab back. But it is obviously clear the hater will lose because the dabbers dab all the time, they are used of doing cool savage dabs. However if this hater has a chance of getting you, your dabbing friends will join up and dab the hater away. It doesn't matter what you do, we are the strongest army, /e dab.

Chapter V - The angle of your dab

Dab. You may be wondering, how savage was that dab? There are multiple aspects of that dab used to figure this out. The aspect I'll be talking today is about the angle of the dab. The closer to 120°, the more savage the dab. Is there any way to surpass this 120° of savageness? Yes, there is! For every additional 180° added to the dab, the more legendary that dab is. If you go above 360°, you'll reach a new level of dabbing. You are at the master rank of dabbing (ranks will be talked about in a future chapter). If you get to four20° you're at the MLG dab. But woah, 480°! It is the 360° dab with the 120° savage dab, wow. Depending on how accurate that dab was, you might be at the Legendary angle dabber rank. If you want to most definitely know if you have made it to being a legendary angle dabber then go 720° and above. The cool thing is by reading this, you have mastered the knowledge of the angles of dabbing, now the haters cannot mess with you. They'll have to deal with your overpowering dabbing power. Deal with it haters, /e dab!

Chapter VI - Speed

This may seem obvious, but it is forgotten a lot. The speed of your dab is critical on how savage and cool your dab is. There are the common types of speeds. The first speed is the lightning dab. The lightning speed is good for a urgent surprise, or staying partially hidden from unwanted haters. Another dabbing speed is the casual dab, and it is not a great dab for anything. Uneducated dabbers that are noobs normally use this dabbing speed. The final speed of the dab is the slow dab. This is used for savage dabbers that want to be the attention, to create a very deep dab, or to make it obvious that it is a dab. It usually ends well but if the duration of the dab is too long then people will call you cringy so avoid lengthy dabs. The haters will run from you because of your epic dab, the haters aren't good enough to deal with it, /e dab.

Chapter VII - Why dab

Why are you dabbing? I will discuss the reasons on why you may be dabbing. It may be for triggering the haters, or maybe because you're a savage. There's also a possibility that you're trying to create a dabbing sport. Hopefully you aren't a hater doing it to dab back against a dabber, because you won't win. Okay, for the first reason that I was talking about, the haters really like to get triggered by anyone dabbing. It's great because the haters won't mess with you and if the haters do try to mess you up, you can always get revenge with a group of dabbers. Now onto the next reason, you're a savage and you dab anytime it is socially acceptable to do so. Yes.. *sneeze dab* you know you're savage, whenever you pick up something, dab. When your parents find out what you have done, dab. It works, it's a great lifestyle. No but that's not enough dabbing, you gotta take it a notch up and create a sport out of all the dabbing. Make some dabbing wars, making the maximum amount of legit dabs you can do in a minute, seeing how many haters you can trigger in a minute, it's basically the Olympics. All the haters can do is cringe, it doesn't really help because the haters will have to deal with it, /e dab.

Chapter VIII - Dabbing is good for defeating the haters

A hater approaches and hates. What are you gonna do, hate back like everyone else does? That isn't the best way to handle this situation because everyone already does it and has a comeback to hating back, but dabbing back. It's great and a much better way to deal with the haters. It also doesn't take as much effort to dab back once you're used to it. Another reason why it's good is because your friends can team up with you and the haters will be surrounded with the most epic savage lit dabs and they will be scared. The haters will run away like children getting a punishment. The best thing that makes dabbing better over hating is the fact that people will get triggered more. The haters can't handle the savageness and they won't be able to mess with you ever again, /e dab.

Chapter IX - How "deep" should you dab?

What do I mean by this? It means how much you should bend your back or head to create the most savo (savage) dab ever. First, I will talk about making a deep dab with your back. You don't need to bend your back much, about 15-30° is good for a decently lit dab. If you think you're up for the challenge, you can attempt to do such a deep dab that only the highly skilled dabbers dare do. You can try going to make 40-50° look good, but this takes practice and it won't be great if you haven't dabbed much so please stick with the normal range of dabbing. If you're such an epic savage dabber then you can try to beat the record of a (not-so-weird looking by the average person) dab of 148°.

Chapter X - The controversy

If you've dabbed enough times, you will find that there is a bunch of controversy when dabbing. Some think that it isn't cool, that's not true at all and it's been proven so many times. When you dab; and dab well, you become a really lit person in life. More people will think you're savage and you will know that you were always inside a dabber. Life only gets better when you're a dabber, except for the overwhelming amount of haters in society. All they do is hate at what you do. The reality is they are jealous at how legit your dabs get. It's clear that the haters are trying so hard to be ignorant about the truth of dabbing but sooner or later the flames will be at the haters, /e dab.

Chapter XI - Confidence

It takes some savage confidence to be a dabber. Many people won't dare dab because they are just too nervous of doing it or worried that they will mess up in their first dab. The truth is you're working yourself too much! Dabbing only makes you better at being lit, it makes sure you absorb all the savageness you can, and you'll become the best dabber in your neighborhood. The haters are always trying to be an issue but if you can dab them away in flames it really won't be much of an issue.
 

InsertUsernameHere

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Feb 11, 2018
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thebestofeverthing12
*Reads first sentence*
oh ok.
it is opinion anyways, cant fight about that.
Am I right?
 

Archaxe

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Feb 10, 2018
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Archaxe
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Discord? You mean the guy from My Little Pony?
Dab backwards is baD. That's your answer.
 
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